<h3><SPAN name="CHAPTER_IX" id="CHAPTER_IX">CHAPTER IX.</SPAN> <br/>In a haymow below zero</h3>
<p class="toclink"><SPAN href="#CONTENTS">TOC</SPAN></p>
<div class="verse0">
<div class="stanzaindent"> In the first lighted house there was a woman who
would not open to
me.   .   .   .</div>
<div class="stanzaindent"> Modestine was led away by a layman to the stables, and
I and my pack were received into our Lady of the Snows.</div>
<cite class="citeright">—Travels with a Donkey.</cite></div>
<p>Having been directed on the road to Pittsford, a town
seven miles beyond, we tramped wearily on, battling with
the elements as best we could until midnight, when almost
numb with cold, I resolved to seek refuge in
a small hamlet we were nearing, called Bushnell
Basin. I was told it contained a tavern
which would accommodate us, in an emergency. But
it was so dark when we reached Bushnell that I could
not see the Basin. Its dozen dusky-looking shanties
seemed to be deserted, and when I saw a boy crossing the
road I was too surprised to hail him. Mac brayed, and
the lad stopped. I asked him where the hotel was. He
directed me toward a dim light, and disappeared. We
pushed on, but the light was extinguished before we could
reach the house. I called loudly to the landlord to let me
in; I rapped on the door desperately, and repeated my
yells. A dog in the house barked savagely; then Mac
began to bray, and I wondered that nobody entered a protest
against such a disturbance. At length, a squeaky female
voice called from an upstairs window:</p>
<p>"Who be ye?"</p>
<p>"A man," I answered, civilly.</p>
<p>"What kind of a man?"</p>
<p>"A gentleman," I said, with emphasis.</p>
<p>"What's that thing yer got with ye?"</p>
<p>I was afraid she'd catch cold in the opened window, if
she was in her nightdress, but I replied in a voice of a
siren, "A jackass."</p>
<p>"Can't let ye in—no room for shows here—next town,"
fell the frozen words on my benumbed ears.</p>
<p>Then the woman sneezed, and closed the window. Mac
A'Rony seemed to comprehend the situation, but offered
no remedy. I would have covered the three miles to Pittsford,
but the donkey was fagged out, and could barely
drag his legs. Where were we to find shelter at such a
time and place?</p>
<p>Retracing our steps a short distance, I caught the sound
of pounding, as of a hammer. Soon I heard the sawing
of a board, and the saw's enraged voice when it struck a
knot. Saved! I thought, as I walked in the direction
whence the sound emanated. The snow lay ten inches
deep; old Boreas shook the trees, and whistled round the
quivering hovels; and I was so chilled and vexed that, if
another person had dared to ask me what kind of a man
I was, I would have measured somebody for a coffin.</p>
<p>Finally, I came to the house, through whose window I
discerned a lighted candle in a back room. I rapped on
the door. The sawing continued; so did my rapping.
Then the sawing ceased, and the door was opened by a
swarthy, heavy bearded man who extended me a kindly
"Good evenin'." I introduced myself, and pleaded my
case.</p>
<p>"Come in where it's warm," he said; and following him
to the stove, I explained my situation.</p>
<p>"We ain't got much accommodation for ye," he apologized,
"but I can't leave ye and yer pet out in the cold.
This is my wife," and the man introduced me. Then he
censured the landlady of the tavern for not admitting me,
saying she ought to have her license revoked, "If you'd
been a loafing vagabond and drunkard, she'd taken ye in
quick enough," said my sympathetic host; "but as ye was a
gentleman she was embarrassed to know how to treat ye."
From which I gathered that he did know how, and would
prove it. He explained that the front part of the building
was a store; the rear portion was divided into two small
rooms,—a kitchen and a sleeping room. The second floor
was utilized as a hay-loft, wherein was stored Hungarian
hay for his horse, which he said he kept "in a shed 'cross
the road yonder."</p>
<p>"Now, if ye'll lend me a hand," he suggested, "we'll
make room for yer mule in the shed, and my wife'll get
ye something to eat. Then we'll see where we kin tuck
ye comfortable till mornin'."</p>
<p>I pulled on my mittens and followed the man into the
biting wind with a warmer and cheerier heart, and, acquainting
Mac with the good news, proceeded to assist my
host to transfer a huge woodpile in order to obtain the side
of a hen roost lying underneath it, with which to construct
a partition in the shed to preserve peace between horse and
donkey.</p>
<p>By one o'clock Mac was stabled and I in prime condition
to enjoy any kind of a meal. The good wife had fried
me three eggs, and brewed me a pot of tea, and sawed off
several slices of home-made bread, for which I blessed her
in my heart and paid her a compliment by eating it all.</p>
<p>The repast over, I chatted a while with my friends and
smoked; then said if they were ready to retire, I was.
A roughly made staircase reached from the kitchen floor
over the cook-stove to a trap-door in the ceiling, and up
those stairs I followed my host, he with candle in hand, I
with a quilt which I feared the kind people had robbed
from their own bed. Great gaps yawned in the roof and
sides of the loft, through which the wind whistled coldly.
The hay was covered with snow in places and the thermometer
must have been far below zero. But I stuck
my legs in the hay, and pulled a woolen nightshirt over
my traveling clothes, and tucked the quilt round my body,
and put on my hat and earlaps, and soon was as snug as a
bug in a rug, and slept soundly.</p>
<p>I arose early with the family, joined them at breakfast,
paid my host liberally, and started with Mac for Pittsford.
There we were welcomed by a party of young men who
had expected to give us a fitting reception the evening before.
They claimed that, had they known where we were,
they would have rescued us with a bob-sleigh. I did not
tarry with them, but tramped on to Rochester, and arrived
there at 3:30 P. M., having covered thirty-five miles since
the previous morning.</p>
<p>We spent two days in the Flour City. An old business
acquaintance arranged for Mac A'Rony to pose in the
show window of a clothing store, for which I received five
dollars. Although it was dreadfully cold and the wind
blew a gale, Mac attracted every pedestrian on the street.</p>
<p>I called on "Rattlesnake Pete," the proprietor of a well-known
curiosity shop, who wanted to buy my bullet-riddled
hat, but I declined to part with it at any reasonable
price; then I called on the Mayor. He received me
cordially, laughed when I related my adventures, and subscribed
to my book.</p>
<p>Rochester is the seat of a Theological Seminary, and
several breweries. Near by is the celebrated Genesee
Falls, where Sam Patch leaped to his death. Many old
friends called on me during my sojourn, among them a
physician, who gave me a neat little case of medicines,
such as he believed would be most needed in emergency
on such a journey; and while being entertained at a club,
I was presented with a fine sombrero.</p>
<p>In spite of the frigid gale which had been raging three
days, and of the dire predictions of the Western Union
bulletins, I started with Mac for Spencerport at 12:30,
right after lunch. The village lay twelve miles distant.
The biting wind swept across the level meadows, laden
with icy dust from the frozen crust of the snow, and cut
into our faces. Five times were Mac and I welcomed
into houses to warm, but we reached the village an hour
and a half after dark with only my ears frost-bitten, and
soon were comfortably quartered for the night. Next
morning we started for Brockport, eight miles further on,
by the tow-path, which we followed.</p>
<p>The wind was blowing forty miles an hour, and the
mercury fell below zero. Every now and then we had to
turn our backs to the gale to catch our breath. Mac's face
was literally encased in ice; I rubbed my ears and cheeks
constantly to prevent their freezing. Only two or three
sleighs were out, and the drivers of these were wrapped so
thoroughly in robes and mufflers that I could not distinguish
male from female. Still determined not to retreat
to town, I urged my little thoroughbred on, and soon we
were called into a house and permitted to thaw out.</p>
<p>On this occasion Mac, to his own astonishment, as well
as that of the kind lady of the house, stuck his frosted
snoot into a pot of boiling beans on the stove, for which
unprecedented behavior I duly apologized.</p>
<p>Eight more times both of us were taken into hospitable
homes and inns to warm before reaching Brockport at
eight in the evening, more dead than alive. My nose and
ears were now frost-bitten. The towns-people, hearing
of our arrival, flocked into the hotel to chat with me, or
went to the stable to see Mac A'Rony.</p>
<p>Wednesday I resumed the journey, resolved that nothing
save physical incapacity should deter me; now was
the time to harden myself to exposure, and prepare me for
greater trials later on. But before leaving, I purchased
a small hand-sled, and improvised rope-traces by which
Mac could draw my luggage instead of carrying it. Besides,
this novel sort of vehicle would attract attention;
I realized that we must depend for a living more upon
sensation than upon our virtues. The next thing essential
was a collar for the donkey, and I had to make it. But
to make the stubborn beast understand I wished him to
draw the sled, that he wasn't hitched to stand, was the
greatest difficulty I had. Finally, he caught on, and
marched along through the streets quite respectably.</p>
<p>Beyond the town we met with some deep snowdrifts
lying across the road, and Mac's little legs would get
stuck, or he would pretend they were, and I would have
to dig the fellow out with my rifle. Again, while leading
the stubborn animal in order to make better time in the
opposing wind, I would suddenly hear a grating, scraping
sound to the rear, and looking around would find the
sled overturned with its burden. After several such upsets,
I cut a bough from a tree, whittled a toothpick point
to it, and prodded Mac to proper speed, while I walked
behind and with a string steadied the top-heavy load of
freight. Then, this difficulty remedied, Mac, with seeming
rascality, would cross and recross the ridge of ice and
snow in the center of the road, as if he couldn't make up
his mind which of the beaten tracks to follow, or disliked
the monotony of a single trail, every time upsetting the
sled. During that long and frigid day's tramp but one
human being passed me, and he was in a sleigh. He recognized
my outfit, for he called to me encouragingly,
"Stick to it, Pod; you'll win yet!"</p>
<p>Late in the afternoon a man hailed me from the door
of a farm-house, "Come in and warm, and have a drink of
cider." Now, if there was one thing in the world that
tickled my palate, it was sweet cider, and I accepted a
glass.</p>
<p>"Wouldn't your pard have a drink?" asked the generous
man.</p>
<p>"Presume he would, if you offered it," I replied. "I
never knew him to refuse any kind of a beverage, though
this cider is pretty hard."</p>
<p>The farmer brought out a milk-pan; and that donkey
drained the pan.</p>
<p>"Shall I give him some more?" asked the big-hearted
soul. Mac stuck out his nose in mute response, so I said
yes, provided he would not be robbing himself; it would
probably put new vigor in the fatigued animal, and super-induce
more speed.</p>
<p>"Got barrels of it, friend, barrels of it," said the Good
Samaritan, who refilled the pan which Mac again drained.
Then thanking the farmer, I steered my donkey on over
the ice-bound highway.</p>
<div class="figcenter"> <SPAN name="Mac_could_draw_my_luggage"></SPAN> <SPAN href="images/i080a-hd.jpg">larger <ANTIMG src="images/i080a.jpg" width-obs="400" height-obs="338" alt="" /></SPAN> <div class="caption">"Mac could draw my luggage instead of carrying it."</div>
</div>
<div class="figcenter"> <SPAN name="Macs_little_legs_would"></SPAN> <SPAN href="images/i080b-hd.jpg">larger <ANTIMG src="images/i080b.jpg" width-obs="400" height-obs="339" alt="" /></SPAN> <div class="caption">"Mac's little legs would get stuck."</div>
</div>
<p>We had not proceeded a mile when I observed that Mac
did not walk as firmly as he had; his course was decidedly
zig-zag. Finally I left my station at the sled and guided
him by the bit. Now he staggered more than ever; then
it dawned on me that the cider had gone to his head. In
less than five minutes more I regretted having met that
liberal-hearted farmer, possessing barrels of hard cider.
Suddenly the drunken donkey fell down in the snow, and,
instead of attempting to rise, he tried to stand on his head.
Not succeeding in that, he made an effort to sit up, and
toppled over backwards. All this time he brayed ecstatically,
as if in the seventh heaven. Next he began to roll,
and tangled himself in the rope traces, and tumbled the
sled and gladstone bag about the snow as though it were
rubbish. Fearing lest he would break my rifle and cameras,
I tried to unbuckle them from the saddle while the
scapegrace was in the throes of delirium tremens, and got
tangled up with him in the ropes. In trying to free myself,
I was accidentally kicked over in the snow. And in
that ridiculous and awkward fix I was found by a jovial
farmer, who drove up in a sleigh. He soon helped me out
of my scrape, and laughed me into good humor, kindly
consenting to take charge of my luggage and send a bob-sleigh
after the drunkard as soon as he reached his house,
a mile beyond.</p>
<p>There I waited for the relief committee and the wrecking
sleigh to arrive. To say I was the maddest of mortals
doesn't half express it. At length two strong men with
my help succeeded in depositing Mac on the bob; and he
was conveyed to the barn and there placed behind the
bars, bedded and fed, and left to sober up, while I, his outraged
master, was hospitably entertained over night by
my charitable benefactor.</p>
<p>We were now at Rich's Corners, some four miles from
Albion. My good host provided me with such warm apparel
as I hadn't with me, and when bed-time came, I was
trundled into a downy bed where I dreamed all night
about drunken jackasses.</p>
<p>By breakfast time I had recovered my good spirits. I
insisted on baking the buckwheat cakes, and not until all
the family were apparently filled with the flapjacks which
I tossed in the air to their amusement did I sit down to
the table to eat.</p>
<p>Breakfast over, I joined my host in a smoke, then
donned my wraps for the day's journey. When we men
returned from the barn with the reformed donkey, a number
of the neighboring farmers had assembled with their
families on the porch to see the overland pilgrims. I
snapped my camera on the group, said "Go on, Mac," to
my remorseful partner, and soon was plodding toward
Albion.</p>
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