<p><SPAN name="link2H_4_0053" id="link2H_4_0053"></SPAN></p>
<h2> To Dr LEWIS. </h2>
<h3> DEAR DOCTOR, </h3>
<p>I have now reached the northern extremity of England, and see, close to my
chamber-window, the Tweed gliding through the arches of that bridge which
connects this suburb to the town of Berwick.—Yorkshire you have
seen, and therefore I shall say nothing of that opulent province. The city
of Durham appears like a confused heap of stones and brick, accumulated so
as to cover a mountain, round which a river winds its brawling course. The
Streets are generally narrow, dark, and unpleasant, and many of them
almost impassible in consequence of their declivity. The cathedral is a
huge gloomy pile; but the clergy are well lodged.— The bishop lives
in a princely manner—the golden prebends keep plentiful tables—and,
I am told, there is some good sociable company in the place; but the
country, when viewed from the top of Gateshead-Fell, which extends to
Newcastle, exhibits the highest scene of cultivation that ever I beheld.
As for Newcastle, it lies mostly in a bottom, on the banks of the Tyne,
and makes an appearance still more disagreeable than that of Durham; but
it is rendered populous and rich by industry and commerce; and the country
lying on both sides the river, above the town, yields a delightful
prospect of agriculture and plantation. Morpeth and Alnwick are neat,
pretty towns, and this last is famous for the castle which has belonged so
many ages to the noble house of Piercy, earls of Northumberland.—It
is, doubtless, a large edifice, containing a great number of apartments,
and stands in a commanding situation; but the strength of it seems to have
consisted not so much in its site, or the manner in which it is fortified,
as in the valour of its defendants.</p>
<p>Our adventures since we left Scarborough, are scarce worth reciting; and
yet I must make you acquainted with my sister Tabby's progress in
husband-hunting, after her disappointments at Bath and London. She had
actually begun to practise upon a certain adventurer, who was in fact a
highwayman by profession; but he had been used to snares much more
dangerous than any she could lay, and escaped accordingly. Then she opened
her batteries upon an old weather-beaten Scotch lieutenant, called
Lismahago, who joined us at Durham, and is, I think, one of the most
singular personages I ever encountered—His manner is as harsh as his
countenance; but his peculiar turn of thinking, and his pack of knowledge
made up of the remnants of rarities, rendered his conversation desirable,
in spite of his pedantry and ungracious address. I have often met with a
crab-apple in a hedge, which I have been tempted to eat for its flavour,
even while I was disgusted by its austerity. The spirit of contradiction
is naturally so strong in Lismahago, that I believe in my conscience he
has rummaged, and read, and studied with indefatigable attention, in order
to qualify himself to refute established maxims, and thus raise trophies
for the gratification of polemical pride.—Such is the asperity of
his self-conceit, that he will not even acquiesce in a transient
compliment made to his own individual in particular, or to his country in
general.</p>
<p>When I observed, that he must have read a vast number of books to be able
to discourse on such a variety of subjects, he declared he had read little
or nothing, and asked how he should find books among the woods of America,
where he had spent the greatest part of his life. My nephew remarking that
the Scots in general were famous for their learning, he denied the
imputation, and defied him to prove it from their works—'The Scots
(said he) have a slight tincture of letters, with which they make a parade
among people who are more illiterate than themselves; but they may be said
to float on the surface of science, and they have made very small advances
in the useful arts.' 'At least (cried Tabby), all the world allows that
the Scots behaved gloriously in fighting and conquering the savages of
America.' 'I can assure you, madam, you have been misinformed (replied the
lieutenant); in that continent the Scots did nothing more than their duty,
nor was there one corps in his majesty's service that distinguished itself
more than another.—Those who affected to extol the Scots for
superior merit, were no friends to that nation.'</p>
<p>Though he himself made free with his countrymen, he would not suffer any
other person to glance a sarcasm at them with impunity. One of the company
chancing to mention lord B—'s inglorious peace, the lieutenant
immediately took up the cudgels in his lordship's favour, and argued very
strenuously to prove that it was the most honourable and advantageous
peace that England had ever made since the foundation of the monarchy.—Nay,
between friends, he offered such reasons on this subject, that I was
really confounded, if not convinced.—He would not allow that the
Scots abounded above their proportion in the army and navy of
Great-Britain, or that the English had any reason to say his countrymen
had met with extraordinary encouragement in the service. 'When a South and
North-Briton (said he) are competitors for a place or commission, which is
in the disposal of an English minister or an English general, it would be
absurd to suppose that the preference will not be given to the native of
England, who has so many advantages over his rival.—First and
foremost, he has in his favour that laudable partiality, which, Mr Addison
says, never fails to cleave to the heart of an Englishman; secondly, he
has more powerful connexions, and a greater share of parliamentary
interest, by which those contests are generally decided; and lastly, he
has a greater command of money to smooth the way to his success. For my
own part (said he), I know no Scotch officer, who has risen in the army
above the rank of a subaltern, without purchasing every degree of
preferment either with money or recruits; but I know many gentlemen of
that country, who, for want of money and interest, have grown grey in the
rank of lieutenants; whereas very few instances of this ill-fortune are to
be found among the natives of South-Britain.—Not that I would
insinuate that my countrymen have the least reason to complain. Preferment
in the service, like success in any other branch of traffic, will
naturally favour those who have the greatest stock of cash and credit,
merit and capacity being supposed equal on all sides.'</p>
<p>But the most hardy of all this original's positions were these: That
commerce would, sooner or later, prove the ruin of every nation, where it
flourishes to any extent—that the parliament was the rotten part of
the British constitution—that the liberty of the press was a
national evil—and that the boasted institution of juries, as managed
in England, was productive of shameful perjury and flagrant injustice. He
observed, that traffick was an enemy to all the liberal passions of the
soul, founded on the thirst of lucre, a sordid disposition to take
advantage of the necessities of our fellow creatures.—He affirmed,
the nature of commerce was such, that it could not be fixed or
perpetuated, but, having flowed to a certain height, would immediately
begin to ebb, and so continue till the channels should be left almost dry;
but there was no instance of the tide's rising a second time to any
considerable influx in the same nation. Mean while the sudden affluence
occasioned by trade, forced open all the sluices of luxury and overflowed
the land with every species of profligacy and corruption; a total pravity
of manners would ensue, and this must be attended with bankruptcy and
ruin. He observed of the parliament, that the practice of buying boroughs,
and canvassing for votes, was an avowed system of venality, already
established on the ruins of principle, integrity, faith, and good order,
in consequence of which the elected and the elector, and, in short, the
whole body of the people, were equally and universally contaminated and
corrupted. He affirmed, that of a parliament thus constituted, the crown
would always have influence enough to secure a great majority in its
dependence, from the great number of posts, places, and pensions it had to
bestow; that such a parliament would (as it had already done) lengthen the
term of its sitting and authority, whenever the prince should think it for
his interest to continue the representatives, for, without doubt, they had
the same right to protect their authority ad infinitum, as they had to
extend it from three to seven years.—With a parliament, therefore,
dependent upon the crown, devoted to the prince, and supported by a
standing army, garbled and modelled for the purpose, any king of England
may, and probably some ambitious sovereign will, totally overthrow all the
bulwarks of the constitution; for it is not to be supposed that a prince
of high spirit will tamely submit to be thwarted in all his measures,
abused and insulted by a populace of unbridled ferocity, when he has it in
his power to crush all opposition under his feet with the concurrence of
the legislature. He said, he should always consider the liberty of the
press as a national evil, while it enabled the vilest reptile to soil the
lustre of the most shining merit, and furnished the most infamous
incendiary with the means of disturbing the peace and destroying the good
order of the community. He owned, however, that under due restrictions, it
would be a valuable privilege; but affirmed, that at present there was no
law in England sufficient to restrain it within proper bounds.</p>
<p>With respect to juries, he expressed himself to this effect:—juries
are generally composed of illiterate plebeians, apt to be mistaken, easily
misled, and open to sinister influence; for if either of the parties to be
tried, can gain over one of the twelve jurors, he has secured the verdict
in his favour; the juryman thus brought over will, in despight of all
evidence and conviction, generally hold out till his fellows are fatigued,
and harassed, and starved into concurrence; in which case the verdict is
unjust, and the jurors are all perjured: but cases will often occur, when
the jurors are really divided in opinion, and each side is convinced in
opposition to the other; but no verdict will be received, unless they are
unanimous, and they are all bound, not only in conscience, but by oath, to
judge and declare according to their conviction.—What then will be
the consequence?—They must either starve in company, or one side
must sacrifice their conscience to their convenience, and join in a
verdict which they believe to be false. This absurdity is avoided in
Sweden, where a bare majority is sufficient; and in Scotland, where two
thirds of the jury are required to concur in the verdict.</p>
<p>You must not imagine that all these deductions were made on his part,
without contradictions on mine.—No—the truth is, I found
myself piqued in point of honour, at his pretending to be so much wiser
than his neighbours.—I questioned all his assertions, started
innumerable objections, argued and wrangled with uncommon perseverance,
and grew very warm, and even violent, in the debate.—Sometimes he
was puzzled, and once or twice, I think, fairly refuted; but from those
falls he rose again, like Antaeus, with redoubled vigour, till at length I
was tired, exhausted, and really did not know how to proceed, when luckily
he dropped a hint, by which he discovered he had been bred to the law; a
confession which enabled me to retire from the dispute with a good grace,
as it could not be supposed that a man like me, who had been bred to
nothing, should be able to cope with a veteran in his own profession. I
believe, however, that I shall for some time continue to chew the cud of
reflection upon many observations which this original discharged.</p>
<p>Whether our sister Tabby was really struck with his conversation, or is
resolved to throw at every thing she meets in the shape of a man, till she
can fasten the matrimonial noose, certain it is, she has taken desperate
strides towards the affection of Lismahago, who cannot be said to have met
her half way, though he does not seem altogether insensible to her
civilities.—She insinuated more than once how happy we should be to
have his company through that part of Scotland which we proposed to visit,
till at length he plainly told us, that his road was totally different
from that which we intended to take; that, for his part, his company would
be of very little service to us in our progress, as he was utterly
unacquainted with the country, which he had left in his early youth,
consequently, he could neither direct us in our enquiries, nor introduce
us to any family of distinction. He said, he was stimulated by an
irresistible impulse to revisit the paternus lar, or patria domus, though
he expected little satisfaction, inasmuch as he understood that his
nephew, the present possessor, was but ill qualified to support the honour
of the family.—He assured us, however, as we design to return by the
west road, that he will watch our motions, and endeavour to pay his
respects to us at Dumfries.—Accordingly he took his leave of us at a
place half way betwixt Morpeth and Alnwick, and pranced away in great
state, mounted on a tall, meagre, raw-boned, shambling grey gelding,
without e'er a tooth in his head, the very counter-part of the rider; and,
indeed, the appearance of the two was so picturesque, that I would give
twenty guineas to have them tolerably presented on canvas.</p>
<p>Northumberland is a fine county, extending to the Tweed, which is a
pleasant pastoral stream; but you will be surprised when I tell you that
the English side of that river is neither so well cultivated nor so
populous as the other.—The farms are thinly scattered, the lands
uninclosed, and scarce a gentleman's seat is to be seen in some miles from
the Tweed; whereas the Scots are advanced in crowds to the very brink of
the river, so that you may reckon above thirty good houses, in the compass
of a few miles, belonging to proprietors whose ancestors had fortified
castles in the same situations, a circumstance that shews what dangerous
neighbours the Scots must have formerly been to the northern counties of
England.</p>
<p>Our domestic oeconomy continues on the old footing.—My sister Tabby
still adheres to methodism, and had the benefit of a sermon at Wesley's
meeting in Newcastle; but I believe the Passion of love has in some
measure abated the fervour of devotion both in her and her woman, Mrs
Jenkins, about whose good graces there has been a violent contest betwixt
my nephew's valet, Mr Dutton, and my man, Humphry Clinker.—Jery has
been obliged to interpose his authority to keep the peace, and to him I
have left the discussion of that important affair, which had like to have
kindled the flames of discord in the family of</p>
<p>Yours always, MATT. BRAMBLE TWEEDMOUTH, July 15.</p>
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