<p><SPAN name="link2H_4_0022" id="link2H_4_0022"></SPAN></p>
<h2> To Dr LEWIS. </h2>
<h3> DEAR LEWIS, </h3>
<p>I received your bill upon Wiltshire, which was punctually honoured; but as
I don't choose to keep so much cash by me, in a common lodging house, I
have deposited 250l. in the bank of Bath, and shall take their bills for
it in London, when I leave this place, where the season draws to an end—You
must know, that now being a-foot, I am resolved to give Liddy a glimpse of
London. She is one of the best hearted creatures I ever knew, and gains
upon my affection every day—As for Tabby, I have dropt such hints to
the Irish baronet, concerning her fortune, as, I make no doubt, will cool
the ardour of his addresses. Then her pride will take the alarm; and the
rancour of stale maidenhood being chafed, we shall hear nothing but
slander and abuse of Sir Ulic Mackilligut—This rupture, I foresee,
will facilitate our departure from Bath; where, at present, Tabby seems to
enjoy herself with peculiar satisfaction. For my part, I detest it so
much, that I should not have been able to stay so long in the place if I
had not discovered some old friends; whose conversation alleviates my
disgust—Going to the coffeehouse one forenoon, I could not help
contemplating the company, with equal surprize and compassion—We
consisted of thirteen individuals; seven lamed by the gout, rheumatism, or
palsy; three maimed by accident; and the rest either deaf or blind. One
hobbled, another hopped, a third dragged his legs after him like a wounded
snake, a fourth straddled betwixt a pair of long crutches, like the mummy
of a felon hanging in chains; a fifth was bent into a horizontal position,
like a mounted telescope, shoved in by a couple of chairmen; and a sixth
was the bust of a man, set upright in a wheel machine, which the waiter
moved from place to place.</p>
<p>Being struck with some of their faces, I consulted the subscription-book;
and, perceiving the names of several old friends, began to consider the
groupe with more attention. At length I discovered rear-admiral Balderick,
the companion of my youth, whom I had not seen since he was appointed
lieutenant of the Severn. He was metamorphosed into an old man, with a
wooden leg and a weatherbeaten face, which appeared the more ancient from
his grey locks, that were truly venerable—Sitting down at the table,
where he was reading a news-paper, I gazed at him for some minutes, with a
mixture of pleasure and regret, which made my heart gush with tenderness;
then, taking him by the hand, 'Ah, Sam (said I) forty years ago I little
thought'—I was too much moved to proceed. 'An old friend, sure
enough! (cried he, squeezing my hand, and surveying me eagerly through his
glasses) I know the looming of the vessel, though she has been hard
strained since we parted; but I can't heave up the name'—The moment
I told him who I was, he exclaimed, 'Ha! Matt, my old fellow cruizer,
still afloat!' And, starting up, hugged me in his arms. His transport,
however, boded me no good; for, in saluting me, he thrust the spring of
his spectacles into my eye, and, at the same time, set his wooden stump
upon my gouty toe; an attack that made me shed tears in sad earnest—After
the hurry of our recognition was over, he pointed out two of our common
friends in the room: the bust was what remained of colonel Cockril, who
had lost the use of his limbs in making an American campaign; and the
telescope proved to be my college chum, sir Reginald Bently; who, with his
new title, and unexpected inheritance, commenced fox-hunter, without
having served his apprenticeship to the mystery; and, in consequence of
following the hounds through a river, was seized with an inflammation of
his bowels, which has contracted him into his present attitude.</p>
<p>Our former correspondence was forthwith renewed, with the most hearty
expressions of mutual good-will, and as we had met so unexpectedly, we
agreed to dine together that very day at the tavern. My friend Quin, being
luckily unengaged, obliged us with his company; and, truly, this the most
happy day I have passed these twenty years. You and I, Lewis, having been
always together, never tasted friendship in this high gout, contracted
from long absence. I cannot express the half of what I felt at this casual
meeting of three or four companions, who had been so long separated, and
so roughly treated by the storms of life. It was a renovation of youth; a
kind of resuscitation of the dead, that realized those interesting dreams,
in which we sometimes retrieve our ancient friends from the grave. Perhaps
my enjoyment was not the less pleasing for being mixed with a strain of
melancholy, produced by the remembrance of past scenes, that conjured up
the ideas of some endearing connexions, which the hand of Death has
actually dissolved.</p>
<p>The spirits and good humour of the company seemed to triumph over the
wreck of their constitutions. They had even philosophy enough to joke upon
their own calamities; such is the power of friendship, the sovereign
cordial of life—I afterwards found, however, that they were not
without their moments, and even hours of disquiet. Each of them apart, in
succeeding conferences, expatiated upon his own particular grievances; and
they were all malcontents at bottom—Over and above their personal
disasters, they thought themselves unfortunate in the lottery of life.
Balderick complained, that all the recompence he had received for his long
and hard service, was the half-pay of a rear-admiral. The colonel was
mortified to see himself over-topped by upstart generals, some of whom he
had once commanded; and, being a man of a liberal turn, could ill put up
with a moderate annuity, for which he had sold his commission. As for the
baronet, having run himself considerably in debt, on a contested election,
he has been obliged to relinquish his seat in parliament, and his seat in
the country at the same time, and put his estate to nurse; but his
chagrin, which is the effect of his own misconduct, does not affect me
half so much as that of the other two, who have acted honourable and
distinguished parts on the great theatre, and are now reduced to lead a
weary life in this stew-pan of idleness and insignificance. They have long
left off using the waters, after having experienced their inefficacy. The
diversions of the place they are not in a condition to enjoy. How then do
they make shift to pass their time? In the forenoon they crawl out to the
Rooms or the coffeehouse, where they take a hand at whist, or descant upon
the General Advertiser; and their evenings they murder in private parties,
among peevish invalids, and insipid old women—This is the case with
a good number of individuals, whom nature seems to have intended for
better purposes.</p>
<p>About a dozen years ago, many decent families, restricted to small
fortunes, besides those that came hither on the score of health, were
tempted to settle at Bath, where they could then live comfortably, and
even make a genteel appearance, at a small expence: but the madness of the
times has made the place too hot for them, and they are now obliged to
think of other migrations—Some have already fled to the mountains of
Wales, and others have retired to Exeter. Thither, no doubt, they will be
followed by the flood of luxury and extravagance, which will drive them
from place to place to the very Land's End; and there, I suppose, they
will be obliged to ship themselves to some other country. Bath is become a
mere sink of profligacy and extortion. Every article of house-keeping is
raised to an enormous price; a circumstance no longer to be wondered at,
when we know that every petty retainer of fortune piques himself upon
keeping a table, and thinks it is for the honour of his character to wink
at the knavery of his servants, who are in a confederacy with the
market-people; and, of consequence, pay whatever they demand. Here is now
a mushroom of opulence, who pays a cook seventy guineas a week for
furnishing him with one meal a day. This portentous frenzy is become so
contagious, that the very rabble and refuse of mankind are infected. I
have known a negro-driver, from Jamaica, pay over-night, to the master of
one of the rooms, sixty-five guineas for tea and coffee to the company,
and leave Bath next morning, in such obscurity, that not one of his guests
had the slightest idea of his person, or even made the least inquiry about
his name. Incidents of this kind are frequent; and every day teems with
fresh absurdities, which are too gross to make a thinking man merry.</p>
<p>—But I feel the spleen creeping on me apace; and therefore will
indulge you with a cessation, that you may have no unnecessary cause to
curse your correspondence with,</p>
<p>Dear Dick, Yours ever, MAT. BRAMBLE BATH, May 5.</p>
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