<h2 class='c008'>CHAPTER IX</h2></div>
<p class='drop-capa0_0_6 c009'>Fan-shaped, blond, mounted on gauze and guaranteed
undetectable, it arrived from the wig-maker,
preciously packed in a stout cardboard box
six times too large for it and accompanied by a quarter of
a pint of the choicest spirit gum. In the privacy of his
bedroom Gumbril uncoffined it, held it out for his own
admiration, caressed its silkiness and finally tried it on,
holding it provisionally to his chin, in front of the looking-glass.
The effect, he decided immediately, was stunning,
was grandiose. From melancholy and all too mild he saw
himself transformed on the instant into a sort of jovial
Henry the Eighth, into a massive Rabelaisian man, broad
and powerful and exuberant with vitality and hair.</p>
<p class='c010'>The proportions of his face were startlingly altered.
The podium, below the mouth, had been insufficiently
massive to carry the stately order of the nose; and the
ratiocinative attic of the forehead, noble enough, no doubt,
in itself, had been disproportionately high. The beard
now supplied the deficiencies in the stylobate, and planted
now on a firm basement of will, the order of the senses,
the aerial attic of ideas, reared themselves with a more
classical harmoniousness of proportion. It only remained
for him to order from Mr. Bojanus an American coat,
padded out at the shoulders as squarely and heroically as
a doublet of the Cinquecento, and he would look the
complete Rabelaisian man. Great eater, deep drinker,
<span class='pageno' id='Page_119'>119</span>stout fighter, prodigious lover; clear thinker, creator of
beauty, seeker of truth and prophet of heroic grandeurs.
Fitted out with coat and beard, he could qualify for the
next vacancy among the cœnobites of Thelema.</p>
<p class='c010'>He removed his beard—“put his beaver up,” as they
used to say in the fine old days of chivalry; he would have
to remember that little joke for Coleman’s benefit. He
put his beaver up—ha, ha!—and stared ruefully at the far
from Rabelaisian figure which now confronted him. The
moustache—that was genuine enough—which had looked,
in conjunction with the splendid work of art below, so
fierce and manly, served by itself, he now perceived, only
droopily to emphasize his native mildness and melancholy.</p>
<p class='c010'>It was a dismal affair, which might have belonged to
Maurice Barrès in youth; a slanting, flagging, sagging
thing, such as could only grow on the lip of an assiduous
Cultivator of the Me, and would become, as one grew older,
ludicrously out of place on the visage of a roaring Nationalist.
If it weren’t that it fitted in so splendidly with the beard,
if it weren’t that it became so marvellously different in the
new context he had now discovered for it, he would have
shaved it off then and there.</p>
<p class='c010'>Mournful appendage. But now he would transform it,
he would add to it its better half. Zadig’s quatrain to his
mistress, when the tablet on which it was written was
broken in two, became a treasonable libel on the king. So
this moustache, thought Gumbril, as gingerly he applied
the spirit gum to his cheeks and chin, this moustache which
by itself serves only to betray me, becomes, as soon as it is
joined to its missing context, an amorous arm for the
conquest of the fair sex.</p>
<p class='c010'>A little far-fetched, he decided; a little ponderous.
<span class='pageno' id='Page_120'>120</span>And besides, as so few people had read Zadig, not much
use in conversation. Cautiously and with neat, meticulous
finger-tips he adjusted the transformation to his gummed
face, pressed it firmly, held it while it stuck fast. The
portals of Thelema opened before him; he was free of
those rich orchards, those halls and courts, those broad
staircases winding in noble spirals within the flanks of each
of the fair round towers. And it was Coleman who had
pointed out the way; he felt duly grateful. One last look
at the Complete Man, one final and definitive constatation
that the Mild and Melancholy one was, for the time at
least, no more; and he was ready in all confidence to set
out. He selected a loose, light great-coat—not that he
needed a coat at all, for the day was bright and warm; but
until Mr. Bojanus had done his labour of padding he would
have to broaden himself out in this way, even if it did mean
that he might be uncomfortably hot. To fall short of
Complete Manhood for fear of a little inconvenience would
be absurd. He slipped, therefore, into his light coat—a
toga, Mr. Bojanus called it, a very neat toga in real West
Country whipcord. He put on his broadest and blackest
felt hat, for breadth above everything was what he needed
to give him completeness, breadth of stature, breadth of
mind, breadth of human sympathy, breadth of smile,
breadth of humour, breadth of everything. The final
touch was a massive and antique Malacca cane belonging
to his father. If he had possessed a bulldog, he would have
taken it out on a leash. But he did not. He issued into
the sunshine, unaccompanied.</p>
<p class='c010'>But unaccompanied he did not mean to remain for long.
These warm, bright May days were wonderful days for
being in love on. And to be alone on such days was like
<span class='pageno' id='Page_121'>121</span>a malady. It was a malady from which the Mild and
Melancholy Man suffered all too frequently. And yet there
were millions of superfluous women in the country; millions
of them. Every day, in the streets, one saw thousands of
them passing; and some were exquisite, were ravishing,
the only possible soul-mates. Thousands of unique soul-mates
every day. The Mild and Melancholy one allowed
them to pass—for ever. But to-day—to-day he was the
complete and Rabelaisian man; he was bearded to the
teeth; the imbecile game was at its height; there would
be opportunities, and the Complete Man could know how
to take them. No, he would not be unaccompanied for long.</p>
<p class='c010'>Outside in the square the fourteen plane trees glowed in
their young, unsullied green. At the end of every street
the golden muslin of the haze hung in an unwrinkled curtain
that thinned away above the sky’s gauzy horizon to transparent
nothing against the intenser blue. The dim, conch-like
murmur that in a city is silence seemed hazily to identify
itself with the golden mistiness of summer, and against this
dim, wide background the yells of the playing children
detached themselves, distinct and piercing. “Beaver”
they shouted, “beaver!” and, “Is it cold up there?”
Full of playful menace, the Complete Man shook at them
his borrowed Malacca. He accepted their prompt hail as
the most favourable of omens.</p>
<p class='c010'>At the first tobacconist’s Gumbril bought the longest
cigar he could find, and trailing behind him expiring blue
wreaths of Cuban smoke, he made his way slowly and with
an ample swagger towards the Park. It was there, under
the elms, on the shores of the ornamental waters, that he
expected to find his opportunity, that he intended—how
confidently behind his Gargantuan mask!—to take it.</p>
<p class='c010'><span class='pageno' id='Page_122'>122</span>The opportunity offered itself sooner than he expected.</p>
<p class='c010'>He had just turned into the Queen’s Road and was
sauntering past Whiteley’s with the air of one who knows
that he has a right to a good place, to two or three good
places even, in the sun, when he noticed just in front of
him, peering intently at the New Season’s Models, a young
woman whom in his mild and melancholy days he would
have only hopelessly admired, but who now, to the Complete
Man, seemed a destined and accessible prey. She was fairly
tall, but seemed taller than she actually was, by reason of
her remarkable slenderness. Not that she looked disagreeably
thin, far from it. It was a rounded slenderness.
The Complete Man decided to consider her as tubular—flexible
and tubular, like a section of boa constrictor, should
one say. She was dressed in clothes that emphasized this
serpentine slimness, in a close-fitting grey jacket that
buttoned up to the neck and a long, narrow grey skirt that
came down to her ankles. On her head was a small, sleek
black hat, that looked almost as though it were made of
metal. It was trimmed on one side with a bunch of dull
golden foliage.</p>
<p class='c010'>Those golden leaves were the only touch of ornament in
all the severe smoothness and unbroken tubularity of her
person. As for her face, that was neither strictly beautiful
nor strictly ugly, but combined elements of both beauty
and ugliness into a whole that was unexpected, that was
oddly and somehow unnaturally attractive.</p>
<p class='c010'>Pretending, he too, to take an interest in the New Season’s
Models, Gumbril made, squinting sideways over the burning
tip of his cigar, an inventory of her features. The forehead,
that was mostly hidden by her hat; it might be
pensively and serenely high, it might be of that degree of
<span class='pageno' id='Page_123'>123</span>lowness which in men is villainous, but in women is only
another—a rather rustic one perhaps, rather <i><span lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">canaille</span></i> even,
but definitely another—attraction. There was no telling.
As for her eyes, they were green, and limpid; set wide
apart in her head they looked out from under heavy lids
and through openings that slanted up towards the outer
corners. Her nose was slightly aquiline. Her mouth
was full-lipped, but straight and unexpectedly wide. Her
chin was small, round and firm. She had a pale skin, a
little flushed over the cheek-bones, which were prominent.</p>
<p class='c010'>On the left cheek, close under the corner of the slanting
eye, she had a brown mole. Such hair as Gumbril could
see beneath her hat was pale and inconspicuously blond.
When she had finished looking at the New Season’s Models
she moved slowly on, halting for a moment before the
travelling trunks and the fitted picnic baskets; dwelling
for a full minute over the corsets, passing the hats, for some
reason, rather contemptuously, but pausing, which seemed
strange, for a long pensive look at the cigars and wine. As
for the tennis rackets and cricket bats, the school outfits
and the gentleman’s hosiery—she hadn’t so much as a look
for one of them. But how lovingly she lingered before
the boots and shoes! Her own feet, the Complete Man
noticed with satisfaction, had an elegance of florid curves.
And while other folk walked on neat’s leather she was
content to be shod with nothing coarser than mottled
serpent’s skin.</p>
<p class='c010'>Slowly they drifted up Queen’s Road, lingering before
every jeweller’s, every antiquarian’s, every milliner’s on
the way. The stranger gave him no opportunity, and
indeed, Gumbril reflected, how should she? For the
imbecile game on which he was relying is a travelling piquet
<span class='pageno' id='Page_124'>124</span>for two players, not a game of patience. No sane human
being could play it in solitude. He would have to make the
opportunity himself.</p>
<p class='c010'>All that was mild in him, all that was melancholy, shrank
with a sickened reluctance from the task of breaking—with
what consequences delicious and perilous in the future or,
in the case of the deserved snub, immediately humiliating?—a
silence which, by the tenth or twelfth shop window,
had become quite unbearably significant. The Mild and
Melancholy one would have drifted to the top of the road,
sharing, with that community of tastes which is the basis
of every happy union, her enthusiasm for brass candlesticks
and toasting-forks, imitation Chippendale furniture, gold
watch-bracelets and low-waisted summer frocks; would
have drifted to the top of the road and watched her, dumbly,
disappearing for ever into the green Park or along the blank
pavements of the Bayswater Road; would have watched
her for ever disappear and then, if the pubs had happened
to be open, would have gone and ordered a glass of port,
and sitting at the bar would have savoured, still dumbly,
among the other drinkers, the muddy grapes of the Douro,
and his own unique loneliness.</p>
<p class='c010'>That was what the Mild and Melancholy one would have
done. But the sight, as he gazed earnestly into an antiquary’s
window, of his own powerful bearded face reflected
in a sham Heppelwhite mirror, reminded him that the Mild
and Melancholy one was temporarily extinct, and that it
was the Complete Man who now dawdled, smoking his long
cigar, up the Queen’s Road towards the Abbey of Thelema.</p>
<p class='c010'>He squared his shoulders; in that loose toga of Mr.
Bojanus’s he looked as copious as François Premier. The
time, he decided, had come.</p>
<p class='c010'><span class='pageno' id='Page_125'>125</span>It was at this moment that the reflection of the stranger’s
face joined itself in the little mirror, as she made a little
movement away from the Old Welsh dresser in the corner,
to that of his own. She looked at the spurious Heppelwhite.
Their eyes met in the hospitable glass. Gumbril
smiled. The corners of the stranger’s wide mouth seemed
faintly to move; like petals of the magnolia, her eyelids
came slowly down over her slanting eyes. Gumbril turned
from the reflection to the reality.</p>
<p class='c010'>“If you want to say Beaver,” he said, “you may.”</p>
<p class='c010'>The Complete Man had made his first speech.</p>
<p class='c010'>“I want to say nothing,” said the stranger. She spoke
with a charming precision and distinctness, lingering with
a pretty emphasis on the <em>n</em> of nothing. “N—n—nothing”—it
sounded rather final. She turned away, she moved
on.</p>
<p class='c010'>But the Complete Man was not one to be put off by a
mere ultimatum. “There,” he said, falling into step with
her, “now I’ve had it—the deserved snub. Honour is
saved, prestige duly upheld. Now we can get on with our
conversation.”</p>
<p class='c010'>The Mild and Melancholy one stood by, gasping with
astonished admiration.</p>
<p class='c010'>“You are v—very impertinent,” said the stranger,
smiling and looking up from under the magnolia petals.</p>
<p class='c010'>“It is in my character,” said the Complete Man.
“You mustn’t blame me. One cannot escape from one’s
heredity; that’s one’s share of original sin.”</p>
<p class='c010'>“There is always grace,” said the stranger.</p>
<p class='c010'>Gumbril caressed his beard. “True,” he replied.</p>
<p class='c010'>“I advise you to pr—ray for it.”</p>
<p class='c010'>His prayer, the Mild and Melancholy one reflected, had
<span class='pageno' id='Page_126'>126</span>already been answered. The original sin in him had been
self-corrected.</p>
<p class='c010'>“Here is another antique shop,” said Gumbril. “Shall
we stop and have a look at it?”</p>
<p class='c010'>The stranger glanced at him doubtfully. But he looked
quite serious. They stopped.</p>
<p class='c010'>“How revolting this sham cottage furniture is,” Gumbril
remarked. The shop, he noticed, was called ‘Ye Olde
Farme House.’</p>
<p class='c010'>The stranger, who had been on the point of saying how
much she liked those lovely Old Welsh dressers, gave him
her heartiest agreement. “So v—vulgar.”</p>
<p class='c010'>“So horribly refined. So refined and artistic.”</p>
<p class='c010'>She laughed on a descending chromatic scale. This was
excitingly new. Poor Aunt Aggie with her Arts and
Crafts, and her old English furniture. And to think she
had taken them so seriously! She saw in a flash the
fastidious lady that she now was—with Louis whatever-it-was
furniture at home, and jewels, and young poets to tea,
and real artists. In the past, when she had imagined herself
entertaining real artists, it had always been among really
artistic furniture. Aunt Aggie’s furniture. But now—no,
oh no. This man was probably an artist. His beard;
and that big black hat. But not poor; very well dressed.</p>
<p class='c010'>“Yes, it’s funny to think that there are people who call
that sort of thing artistic. One’s quite s—sorry for them,”
she added, with a little hiss.</p>
<p class='c010'>“You have a kind heart,” said Gumbril. “I’m glad to
see that.”</p>
<p class='c010'>“Not v—very kind, I’m af—fraid.” She looked at him
sideways, and significantly as the fastidious lady would have
looked at one of the poets.</p>
<p class='c010'><span class='pageno' id='Page_127'>127</span>“Well, kind enough, I hope,” said the Complete Man.
He was delighted with his new acquaintance.</p>
<p class='c010'>Together they disembogued into the Bayswater Road.
It was here, Gumbril reflected, that the Mild and Melancholy
one would dumbly have slunk away to his glass of
port and his loneliness among the alien topers at the bar.
But the Complete Man took his new friend by the elbow,
and steered her into the traffic. Together they crossed
the road, together entered the park.</p>
<p class='c010'>“I still think you are v—very impertinent,” said the lady.
“What induced you to follow me?”</p>
<p class='c010'>With a single comprehensive gesture, Gumbril indicated
the sun, the sky, the green trees airily glittering, the grass,
the emerald lights and violet shadows of the rustic distance.
“On a day like this,” he said, “how could I help it?”</p>
<p class='c010'>“Original sin?”</p>
<p class='c010'>“Oh,” the Complete Man modestly shook his head, “I
lay no claim to originality in this.”</p>
<p class='c010'>The stranger laughed. This was nearly as good as a young
poet at the tea-table. She was very glad that she’d decided,
after all, to put on her best suit this afternoon, even if it
was a little stuffy for the warmth of the day. He, too, she
noticed, was wearing a great-coat; which seemed rather
odd.</p>
<p class='c010'>“Is it original,” he went on, “to go and tumble stupidly
like an elephant into a pitfall, head over ears, at first
sight...?”</p>
<p class='c010'>She looked at him sideways, then closed down the magnolia
petals, and smiled. This was going to be the real thing—one
of those long, those interminable, or, at any rate,
indefinitely renewable conversations about love; witty,
subtle, penetrating and bold, like the conversations in
<span class='pageno' id='Page_128'>128</span>books, like the conversations across the tea-table between
brilliant young poets and ladies of quality, grown fastidious
through an excessive experience, fastidious and a little
weary, but still, in their subtle way, insatiably curious.</p>
<p class='c010'>“Suppose we sit down,” suggested Gumbril, and he
pointed to a couple of green iron chairs, standing isolated
in the middle of the grass close together and with their
fronts slanting inwards a little towards one another in a
position that suggested a confidential intimacy. At the
prospect of the conversation that, inevitably, was about to
unroll itself, he felt decidedly less elated than did his new
friend. If there was anything he disliked it was conversations
about love. It bored him, oh, it bored him most
horribly, this minute analysis of the passion that young
women always seemed to expect one, at some point or other
in one’s relation with them, to make. How love alters
the character for both good and bad; how physical passion
need not be incompatible with the spiritual; how a hateful
and tyrannous possessiveness can be allied in love with the
most unselfish solicitude for the other party—oh, he knew
all this and much more, so well, so well. And whether
one can be in love with more than one person at a time,
whether love can exist without jealousy, whether pity,
affection, desire can in any way replace the full and genuine
passion—how often he had had to thrash out these dreary
questions!</p>
<p class='c010'>And all the philosophic speculations were equally familiar,
all the physiological and anthropological and psychological
facts. In the theory of the subject he had ceased to take
any interest. Unhappily, a discussion of the theory always
seemed to be an essential preliminary to the practice of it.
He sighed a little wearily as he took his seat on the green
<span class='pageno' id='Page_129'>129</span>iron chair. But then, recollecting that he was now the
Complete Man, and that the Complete Man must do everything
with a flourish and a high hand, he leaned forward
and, smiling with a charming insolence through his beard,
began:</p>
<p class='c010'>“Tiresias, you may remember, was granted the singular
privilege of living both as a man and a woman.”</p>
<p class='c010'>Ah, this was the genuine young poet. Supporting an
elbow on the back of her chair and leaning her cheek against
her hand, she disposed herself to listen and, where necessary,
brilliantly to interpellate; it was through half-closed eyes
that she looked at him, and she smiled faintly in a manner
which she knew, from experience, to be enigmatic, and
though a shade haughty, though a tiny bit mocking and
ironical, exceedingly attractive.</p>
<p class='c010'>An hour and a half later they were driving towards an
address in Bloxam Gardens, Maida Vale. The name
seemed vaguely familiar to Gumbril. Bloxam Gardens—perhaps
one of his aunts had lived there once?</p>
<p class='c010'>“It’s a dr—dreadful little maisonnette,” she explained.
“Full of awful things. We had to take it furnished. It’s
so impossible to find anything now.”</p>
<p class='c010'>Gumbril leaned back in his corner, wondering, as he studied
that averted profile, who or what this young woman could
be. She seemed to be in the obvious movement, to like
the sort of things one would expect people to like; she
seemed to be as highly civilized, in Mr. Mercaptan’s rather
technical sense of the term, as free of all prejudices as the
great exponent of civilization himself.</p>
<p class='c010'>She seemed, from her coolly dropped hints, to possess
all the dangerous experience, all the assurance and easy
ruthlessness of a great lady whose whole life is occupied
<span class='pageno' id='Page_130'>130</span>in the interminable affairs of the heart, the senses and the
head. But, by a strange contradiction she seemed to find
her life narrow and uninteresting. She had complained
in so many words that her husband misunderstood and
neglected her, had complained, by implication, that she
knew very few interesting people.</p>
<p class='c010'>The maisonnette in Bloxam Gardens was certainly not
very splendid—six rooms on the second and third floors of
a peeling stucco house. And the furniture—decidedly
Hire Purchase. And the curtains and cretonnes—brightly
‘modern,’ positively ‘futurist.’</p>
<p class='c010'>“What one has to put up with in furnished flats!”
The lady made a grimace as she ushered him into the
sitting-room. And while she spoke the words, she really
managed to persuade herself that the furniture wasn’t
theirs, that they had found all this sordid stuff cluttering
up the rooms, not chosen it, oh with pains! themselves,
not doggedly paid for it, month by month.</p>
<p class='c010'>“Our own things,” she murmured vaguely, “are stored.
In the Riviera.” It was there, under the palms, among the
gaudy melon flowers and the croupiers that the fastidious
lady had last held her salon of young poets. In the Riviera—that
would explain, now she came to think of it, a lot of
things, if explanation ever became necessary.</p>
<p class='c010'>The Complete Man nodded sympathetically. “Other
people’s tastes,” he held up his hands, they both laughed.
“But why do we think of other people?” he added. And
coming forward with a conquering impulsiveness he took
both her long, fine hands in his and raised them to his
bearded mouth.</p>
<p class='c010'>She looked at him for a second, then dropped her eyelids,
took back her hands. “I must go and make the tea,” she
<span class='pageno' id='Page_131'>131</span>said. “The servants”—the plural was a pardonable
exaggeration—“are out.”</p>
<p class='c010'>Gallantly, the Complete Man offered to come and help
her. These scenes of intimate life had a charm all their
own. But she would not allow it. “No, no,” she was
very firm, “I simply forbid you. You must stay here.
I won’t be a moment,” and she was gone, closing the door
carefully behind her.</p>
<p class='c010'>Left to himself, Gumbril sat down and filed his nails.</p>
<p class='c010'>As for the young lady, she hurried along to her dingy
little kitchen, lit the gas, put the kettle on, set out the
teapot and the cups on a tray, and from the biscuit-box,
where it was stored, took out the remains of a chocolate
cake, which had already seen service at the day-before-yesterday’s
tea-party. When all was ready here, she tiptoed
across to her bedroom and sitting down at her dressing-table,
began with hands that trembled a little with excitement
to powder her nose, and heighten the colour of her
cheeks. Even after the last touch had been given, she still
sat there, looking at her image in the glass.</p>
<p class='c010'>The lady and the poet, she was thinking, the <i><span lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">grande dame</span></i>
and the brilliant young man of genius. She liked young
men with beards. But he was not an artist, in spite of the
beard, in spite of the hat. He was a writer of sorts. So
she gathered; but he was reticent, he was delightfully
mysterious. She too, for that matter. The great lady
slips out, masked, into the street; touches the young man’s
sleeve: Come with me. She chooses, does not let herself
passively be chosen. The young poet falls at her feet;
she lifts him up. One is accustomed to this sort of
thing.</p>
<p class='c010'>She opened her jewel box, took out all her rings—there
<span class='pageno' id='Page_132'>132</span>were not many of them, alas!—and put them on. Two or
three of them, on second thoughts, she took off again; they
were a little, she suspected with a sudden qualm, in other
people’s taste.</p>
<p class='c010'>He was very clever, very artistic—only that seemed to
be the wrong word to use; he seemed to know all the new
things, all the interesting people. Perhaps he would introduce
her to some of them. And he was so much at ease
behind his knowledge, so well assured. But for her part,
she felt pretty certain, she had made no stupid mistakes.
She too had been, had looked at any rate—which was the
important thing—very much at ease.</p>
<p class='c010'>She liked young men with beards. They looked so
Russian. Catherine of Russia had been one of the great
ladies with caprices. Masked in the streets. Young
poet, come with me. Or even, Young butcher’s boy.
But that, no, that was going too far, too low. Still, life,
life—it was there to be lived—life—to be enjoyed. And
now, and now? She was still wondering what would
happen next, when the kettle, which was one of those funny
ones which whistle when they come to the boil, began,
fitfully, at first, then, under full steam, unflaggingly, to
sound its mournful, other-worldly note. She sighed and
bestirred herself to attend to it.</p>
<p class='c010'>“Let me help you.” Gumbril jumped up as she came
into the room. “What can I do?” He hovered rather
ineptly round her.</p>
<p class='c010'>The lady put down her tray on the little table.
“N—nothing,” she said.</p>
<p class='c010'>“N—nothing?” he imitated her with a playful mockery.
“Am I good for n—nothing at all?” He took one of her
hands and kissed it.</p>
<p class='c010'><span class='pageno' id='Page_133'>133</span>“Nothing that’s of the l—least importance.” She sat
down and began to pour out the tea.</p>
<p class='c010'>The Complete Man also sat down. “So to adore at
first sight,” he asked, “is not of the l—least importance?”</p>
<p class='c010'>She shook her head, smiled, raised and lowered her eyelids.
One was so well accustomed to this sort of thing;
it had no importance. “Sugar?” she asked. The young
poet was safely there, sparkling across the tea-table. He
offered love and she, with the easy heartlessness of one who
is so well accustomed to this sort of thing, offered him sugar.</p>
<p class='c010'>He nodded. “Please. But if it’s of no importance to
you,” he went on, “then I’ll go away at once.”</p>
<p class='c010'>The lady laughed her section of a descending chromatic
scale. “Oh no, you won’t,” she said. “You can’t.”
And she felt that the <i><span lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">grande dame</span></i> had made a very fine
stroke.</p>
<p class='c010'>“Quite right,” the Complete Man replied; “I couldn’t.”
He stirred his tea. “But who are you,” he looked up at
her suddenly, “you devilish female?” He was genuinely
anxious to know; and besides, he was paying her a very
pretty compliment. “What do you do with your dangerous
existence?”</p>
<p class='c010'>“I enjoy life,” she said. “I think one ought to enjoy
life. Don’t you? I think it’s one’s first duty.” She
became quite grave. “One ought to enjoy every moment
of it,” she said. “Oh, passionately, adventurously, newly,
excitingly, uniquely.”</p>
<p class='c010'>The Complete Man laughed. “A conscientious hedonist.
I see.”</p>
<p class='c010'>She felt uncomfortably that the fastidious lady had not
quite lived up to her character. She had spoken more like
a young woman who finds life too dull and daily, and would
<span class='pageno' id='Page_134'>134</span>like to get on to the cinema. “I am very conscientious,”
she said, making significant play with the magnolia petals
and smiling her riddling smile. She must retrieve the
Great Catherine’s reputation.</p>
<p class='c010'>“I could see that from the first,” mocked the Complete
Man with a triumphant insolence. “Conscience doth
make cowards of us all.”</p>
<p class='c010'>The fastidious lady only contemptuously smiled. “Have
a little chocolate cake,” she suggested. Her heart was
beating. She wondered, she wondered.</p>
<p class='c010'>There was a long silence. Gumbril finished his chocolate
cake, gloomily drank his tea and did not speak. He found,
all at once, that he had nothing to say. His jovial confidence
seemed, for the moment, to have deserted him. He was
only the Mild and Melancholy one foolishly disguised as a
Complete Man; a sheep in beaver’s clothing. He entrenched
himself behind his formidable silence and waited;
waited, at first, sitting in his chair, then, when this
total inactivity became unbearable, striding about the
room.</p>
<p class='c010'>She looked at him, for all her air of serene composure,
with a certain disquiet. What on earth was he up to now?
What could he be thinking about? Frowning like that,
he looked like a young Jupiter, bearded and burly (though
not, she noticed, quite so burly as he had appeared in his
overcoat) making ready to throw a thunderbolt. Perhaps
he was thinking of her—suspecting her, seeing through the
fastidious lady and feeling angry at her attempted deception.
Or perhaps he was bored with her, perhaps he was
wanting to go away. Well, let him go; she didn’t mind.
Or perhaps he was just made like that—a moody young
poet; that seemed, on the whole, the most likely explanation;
<span class='pageno' id='Page_135'>135</span>it was also the most pleasing and romantic. She
waited. They both waited.</p>
<p class='c010'>Gumbril looked at her and was put to shame by the
spectacle of her quiet serenity. He must do something, he
told himself; he must recover the Complete Man’s lost
<em>morale</em>. Desperately he came to a halt in front of the one
decent picture hanging on the walls. It was an eighteenth-century
engraving of Raphael’s ‘Transfiguration’—better,
he always thought, in black and white than in its bleakly-coloured
original.</p>
<p class='c010'>“That’s a nice engraving,” he said. “Very nice.”
The mere fact of having uttered at all was a great comfort
to him, a real relief.</p>
<p class='c010'>“Yes,” she said, “That belongs to me. I found it in
a second-hand shop, not far from here.”</p>
<p class='c010'>“Photography,” he pronounced, with that temporary
earnestness which made him seem an enthusiast about
everything, “is a mixed blessing. It has made it possible
to reproduce pictures so easily and cheaply, that all the
bad artists who were well occupied in the past, making
engravings of good men’s paintings, are now free to do bad
original work of their own.” All this was terribly impersonal,
he told himself, terribly off the point. He was
losing ground. He must do something drastic to win it
back. But what?</p>
<p class='c010'>She came to his rescue. “I bought another at the same
time,” she said. “‘The Last Communion of St. Jerome,’
by—who is it? I forget.”</p>
<p class='c010'>“Ah, you mean Domenichino’s ‘St. Jerome’?” The
Complete Man was afloat again. “Poussin’s favourite
picture. Mine too, very nearly. I’d like to see that.”</p>
<p class='c010'>“It’s in my room, I’m afraid. But if you don’t mind.”</p>
<p class='c010'><span class='pageno' id='Page_136'>136</span>He bowed. “If <em>you</em> don’t.”</p>
<p class='c010'>She smiled graciously to him and got up. “This way,”
she said, and opened the door.</p>
<p class='c010'>“It’s a lovely picture,” Gumbril went on, loquaciously
now, behind her, as they walked down the dark corridor.
“And besides, I have a sentimental attachment to it.
There used to be a copy of an engraving of it at home, when
I was a child. And I remember wondering and wondering—oh,
it went on for years—every time I saw the picture;
wondering why on earth that old bishop (for I did know
it was a bishop) should be handing the naked old man a
five-shilling piece.”</p>
<p class='c010'>She opened a door; they were in her very pink room.
Grave in its solemn and subtly harmonious beauty, the
picture hung over the mantelpiece, hung there, among the
photographs of the little friends of her own age, like some
strange object from another world. From within that
chipped gilt frame all the beauty, all the grandeur of religion
looked darkly out upon the pink room. The little friends
of her own age, all deliciously nubile, sweetly smiled, turned
up their eyes, clasped Persian cats or stood jauntily, feet
apart, hand in the breeches pocket of the land-girl’s uniform;
the pink roses on the wallpaper, the pink and white
curtains, the pink bed, the strawberry-coloured carpet,
filled all the air with the rosy reflections of nakedness and
life.</p>
<p class='c010'>And utterly remote, absorbed in their grave, solemn
ecstasy, the robed and mitred priest held out, the dying
saint yearningly received, the body of the Son of God.
The ministrants looked gravely on, the little angels looped
in the air above a gravely triumphant festoon, the lion
slept at the saint’s feet, and through the arch beyond, the
<span class='pageno' id='Page_137'>137</span>eye travelled out over a quiet country of dark trees and
hills.</p>
<p class='c010'>“There it is,” she waved towards the mantelpiece.</p>
<p class='c010'>But Gumbril had taken it all in long ago. “You see
what I mean by the five-shilling piece.” And stepping up
to the picture, he pointed to the round bright wafer which
the priest holds in his hand and whose averted disk is like
the essential sun at the centre of the picture’s harmonious
universe. “Those were the days of five-shilling pieces,”
he went on. “You’re probably too young to remember
those large, lovely things. They came my way occasionally,
and consecrated wafers didn’t. So you can understand
how much the picture puzzled me. A bishop giving a
naked old man five shillings in a church, with angels fluttering
overhead, and a lion sleeping in the foreground. It
was obscure, it was horribly obscure.” He turned away
from the picture and confronted his hostess, who was
standing a little way behind him smiling enigmatically
and invitingly.</p>
<p class='c010'>“Obscure,” he repeated. “But so is everything. So is
life in general. And you,” he stepped towards her, “you
in particular.”</p>
<p class='c010'>“Am I?” she lifted her limpid eyes at him. Oh, how
her heart was beating, how hard it was to be the fastidious
lady, calmly satisfying her caprice. How difficult it was to
be accustomed to this sort of thing. What was going to
happen next?</p>
<p class='c010'>What happened next was that the Complete Man came
still closer, put his arms round her, as though he were
inviting her to the fox-trot, and began kissing her with a
startling violence. His beard tickled her neck; shivering
a little, she brought down the magnolia petals across her
<span class='pageno' id='Page_138'>138</span>eyes. The Complete Man lifted her up, walked across the
room carrying the fastidious lady in his arms and deposited
her on the rosy catafalque of the bed. Lying there
with her eyes shut, she did her best to pretend she was
dead.</p>
<p class='c010'>Gumbril had looked at his wrist watch and found that it
was six o’clock. Already? He prepared himself to take
his departure. Wrapped in a pink kimono, she came out
into the hall to wish him farewell.</p>
<p class='c010'>“When shall I see you again, Rosie?” He had learnt
that her name was Rosie.</p>
<p class='c010'>She had recovered her great lady’s equanimity and detachment,
and was able to shrug her shoulders and smile.
“How should I know?” she asked, implying that she could
not foresee what her caprice might be an hour hence.</p>
<p class='c010'>“May I write then, and ask one of these days if you do
know?”</p>
<p class='c010'>She put her head on one side and raised her eyebrows,
doubtfully. At last nodded. “Yes, you can write,” she
permitted.</p>
<p class='c010'>“Good,” said the Complete Man, and picked up his wide
hat. She held out her hand to him with stateliness, and
with a formal gallantry he kissed it. He was just closing
the front door behind him, when he remembered something.
He turned round. “I say,” he called after the
retreating pink kimono. “It’s rather absurd. But how
can I write? I don’t know your name. I can’t just
address it ‘Rosie’”</p>
<p class='c010'>The great lady laughed delightedly. This had the
real <i><span lang="it" xml:lang="it">capriccio</span></i> flavour. “Wait,” she said, and she ran into
the sitting-room. She was back again in a moment with
an oblong of pasteboard. “There,” she said, and dropped
<span class='pageno' id='Page_139'>139</span>it into his great-coat pocket. Then blowing a kiss she was
gone.</p>
<p class='c010'>The Complete Man closed the door and descended the
stairs. Well, well, he said to himself; well, well. He
put his hand in his coat pocket and took out the card. In
the dim light of the staircase he read the name on it with
some difficulty. Mrs. James—but no, but no. He read
again, straining his eyes; there was no question of it.
Mrs. James Shearwater.</p>
<p class='c010'>Mrs. James Shearwater.</p>
<p class='c010'>That was why he had vaguely known the name of Bloxam
Gardens.</p>
<p class='c010'>Mrs. James Shear——. Step after step he descended,
ponderously. “Good Lord,” he said out loud. “Good
Lord.”</p>
<p class='c010'>But why had he never seen her? Why did Shearwater
never produce her? Now he came to think of it, he hardly
ever spoke of her.</p>
<p class='c010'>Why had she said the flat wasn’t theirs? It was; he
had heard Shearwater talk about it.</p>
<p class='c010'>Did she make a habit of this sort of thing!</p>
<p class='c010'>Could Shearwater be wholly unaware of what she was
really like? But, for that matter, what <em>was</em> she really
like?</p>
<p class='c010'>He was half-way down the last flight, when with a rattle
and a squeak of hinges the door of the house, which was
only separated by a short lobby from the foot of the stairs,
opened, revealing, on the doorstep, Shearwater and a
friend, eagerly talking.</p>
<p class='c010'>“... I take my rabbit,” the friend was saying—he was
a young man with dark, protruding eyes, and staring, doggy
nostrils; very eager, lively and loud. “I take my rabbit
<span class='pageno' id='Page_140'>140</span>and I inject into it the solution of eyes, pulped eyes of
another dead rabbit. You see?”</p>
<p class='c010'>Gumbril’s first instinct was to rush up the stairs and hide
in the first likely-looking corner. But he pulled himself
together at once. He was a Complete Man, and Complete
Men do not hide; moreover, he was sufficiently disguised
to be quite unrecognizable. He stood where he was, and
listened to the conversation.</p>
<p class='c010'>“The rabbit,” continued the young man, and with his
bright eyes and staring, sniffing nose, he looked like a
poacher’s terrier ready to go barking after the first white tail
that passed his way; “the rabbit naturally develops the
appropriate resistance, develops a specific anti-eye to protect
itself. I then take some of its anti-eye serum and inject
it into my female rabbit; I then immediately breed from
her.” He paused.</p>
<p class='c010'>“Well?” asked Shearwater, in his slow, ponderous way.
He lifted his great round head inquiringly and looked at
the doggy young man from under his bushy eyebrows.</p>
<p class='c010'>The doggy young man smiled triumphantly. “The
young ones,” he said, emphasizing his words by striking his
right fist against the extended palm of his left hand, “the
young ones are born with defective sight.”</p>
<p class='c010'>Thoughtfully Shearwater pulled at his formidable
moustache. “H’m,” he said slowly. “Very remarkable.”</p>
<p class='c010'>“You realize the full significance of it?” asked the young
man. “We seem to be effecting the germ-plasm directly.
We have found a way of making acquired characteristics....”</p>
<p class='c010'>“Pardon me,” said Gumbril. He had decided that it
was time to be gone. He ran down the stairs and across
the tiled hall, he pushed his way firmly but politely between
the talkers.</p>
<p class='c010'><span class='pageno' id='Page_141'>141</span>“... heritable,” continued the young man, imperturbably
eager, speaking through and over and round the
obstacle.</p>
<p class='c010'>“Damn!” said Shearwater. The Complete Man had
trodden on his toe. “Sorry,” he added, absent-mindedly
apologizing for the injury he had received.</p>
<p class='c010'>Gumbril hurried off along the street. “If we really
have found out a technique for influencing the germ-plasm
directly ...” he heard the doggy young man saying; but
he was already too far away to catch the rest of the sentence.
There are many ways, he reflected, of spending an afternoon.</p>
<p class='c010'>The doggy young man refused to come in, he had to get
in his game of tennis before dinner. Shearwater climbed
the stairs alone. He was taking off his hat in the little hall
of his own apartment, when Rosie came out of the sitting-room
with a trayful of tea-things.</p>
<p class='c010'>“Well?” he asked, kissing her affectionately on the forehead.
“Well? People to tea?”</p>
<p class='c010'>“Only one,” Rosie replied. “I’ll go and make you a
fresh cup.”</p>
<p class='c010'>She glided off, rustling in her pink kimono towards the
kitchen.</p>
<p class='c010'>Shearwater sat down in the sitting-room. He had
brought home with him from the library the fifteenth
volume of the <cite>Biochemical Journal</cite>. There was something
in it he wanted to look up. He turned over the pages.
Ah, here it was. He began reading. Rosie came back
again.</p>
<p class='c010'>“Here’s your tea,” she said.</p>
<p class='c010'>He thanked her without looking up. The tea grew cold
on the little table at his side.</p>
<p class='c010'><span class='pageno' id='Page_142'>142</span>Lying on the sofa, Rosie pondered and remembered.
Had the events of the afternoon, she asked herself, really
happened? They seemed very improbable and remote,
now, in this studious silence. She couldn’t help feeling a
little disappointed. Was it only this? So simple and
obvious? She tried to work herself up into a more exalted
mood. She even tried to feel guilty; but there she failed
completely. She tried to feel rapturous; but without
much more success. Still, he certainly had been a most
extraordinary man. Such impudence, and at the same
time such delicacy and tact.</p>
<p class='c010'>It was a pity she couldn’t afford to change the furniture.
She saw now that it wouldn’t do at all. She would go
and tell Aunt Aggie about the dreadful middle-classness of
her Art and Craftiness.</p>
<p class='c010'>She ought to have an Empire <i><span lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">chaise longue</span></i>. Like Madame
Récamier. She could see herself lying there, dispensing
tea. “Like a delicious pink snake.” He had called her
that.</p>
<p class='c010'>Well, really, now she came to think of it all again, it had
been too queer, too queer.</p>
<p class='c010'>“What’s a hedonist?” she suddenly asked.</p>
<p class='c010'>Shearwater looked up from the <cite>Journal of Biochemistry</cite>.
“What?” he said.</p>
<p class='c010'>“A hedonist.”</p>
<p class='c010'>“A man who holds that the end of life is pleasure.”</p>
<p class='c010'>A ‘conscientious hedonist’—ah, that was good.</p>
<p class='c010'>“This tea is cold,” Shearwater remarked.</p>
<p class='c010'>“You should have drunk it before,” she said. The
silence renewed and prolonged itself.</p>
<p class='c010'>Rosie was getting much better, Shearwater reflected, as
he washed his hands before supper, about not interrupting
<span class='pageno' id='Page_143'>143</span>him when he was busy. This evening she had really not
disturbed him at all, or at most only once, and that not
seriously. There had been times in the past when the
child had really made life almost impossible. There were
those months at the beginning of their married life, when
she had thought she would like to study physiology herself
and be a help to him. He remembered the hours he had
spent trying to teach her elementary facts about the
chromosomes. It had been a great relief when she abandoned
the attempt. He had suggested she should go in for
stencilling patterns on Government linen. Such pretty
curtains and things one could make like that. But she
hadn’t taken very kindly to the idea. There had followed
a long period when she seemed to have nothing to do but
prevent him from doing anything. Ringing him up at the
laboratory, invading his study, sitting on his knee, or
throwing her arms round his neck, or pulling his hair,
or asking ridiculous questions when he was trying to
work.</p>
<p class='c010'>Shearwater flattered himself that he had been extremely
patient. He had never got cross. He had just gone on
as though she weren’t there. As though she weren’t there.</p>
<p class='c010'>“Hurry up,” he heard her calling. “The soup’s getting
cold.”</p>
<p class='c010'>“Coming,” he shouted back, and began to dry his large,
blunt hands.</p>
<p class='c010'>She seemed to have been improving lately. And to-night,
to-night she had been a model of non-existence.</p>
<p class='c010'>He came striding heavily into the dining-room. Rosie
was sitting at the head of the table, ladling out the soup.
With her left hand she held back the flowing pink sleeve of
her kimono so that it should not trail in the plates or the
<span class='pageno' id='Page_144'>144</span>tureen. Her bare arm showed white and pearly through
the steam of lentils.</p>
<p class='c010'>How pretty she was! He could not resist the temptation,
but coming up behind her bent down and kissed her,
rather clumsily, on the back of her neck.</p>
<p class='c010'>Rosie drew away from him. “Really, Jim,” she said,
disapprovingly. “At meal-times!” The fastidious lady
had to draw the line at these ill-timed, tumbling familiarities.</p>
<p class='c010'>“And what about work-times?” Shearwater asked
laughing. “Still, you were wonderful this evening, Rosie,
quite wonderful.” He sat down and began eating his soup.
“Not a sound all the time I was reading; or, at any rate,
only one sound, so far as I remember.”</p>
<p class='c010'>The great lady said nothing, but only smiled—a little
contemptuously and with a touch of pity. She pushed
away the plate of soup unfinished and planted her elbows
on the table. Slipping her hands under the sleeves of her
kimono, she began, lightly, delicately, with the tips of her
fingers, to caress her own arms.</p>
<p class='c010'>How smooth they were, how soft and warm and how
secret under the sleeves. And all her body was as smooth
and warm, was as soft and secret, still more secret beneath
the pink folds. Like a warm serpent hidden away, secretly,
secretly.</p>
<div class='chapter'>
<span class='pageno' id='Page_145'>145</span>
<div style="break-after:column;"></div><br />