the top shelf. A little pile of letters was in my right hand,<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_168" id="Page_168">[168]</SPAN></span>
and a light shot into my eyes, and a gleam of soft warmth
flowed into my heart.</p>
<p>Then I crawled back to my narrow bed, so nearly exchanged
for a narrower, and laid my treasure on my shrunken breast,
and turned on my side, that it might not slide away. I felt as
if there were two Kits now—one who knew nothing about it,
and the other who wanted it all to himself. And perhaps that
other Kit was Kitty.</p>
<p>How long I continued in this crazed condition, it is impossible
for me to say; but as sure as the goodness of God is
with us, it saved my reason and my life. For by-and-by, a
warmth of blood flowed through me, and a sense of being in a
large sweet world; then memory awoke, and pain was gone,
and I was like a little child looking at its mother. I did not
read a word, nor care to read; but I knew whose hand was on
my heart, and I would not disturb it by a stir of thought, but
was satisfied with it, for it was everything. And so I fell into
a long deep sleep; and when I awoke, I was a man again.</p>
<hr class="chap" /></div>
<h2>CHAPTER XXVIII.<br/> <small>OUT OF ALL REASON.</small></h2>
<p class="unindent"><span class="smcap">Worse</span> troubles than those of the troublesome body were
visiting one worth a thousand of me. Captain Fairthorn was
still in Scotland, while his fair daughter was being worried, as
a lamb among playful wolves. Without any aid her step-mother
was enough to supply her with constant misery; but
even her malice was more easy to endure than the insolent
attentions of two vile men. To these the poor girl was exposed
every day; for if she took refuge in her own room, she was
bodily compelled to come down again, and her gentle appeals
and even strong disdain were treated as a child’s coquetry.
There are few things more truculent to a woman, even a very
young one, than the jocular assumption that she does not know
her mind, and perhaps has little of that article to know. Sir
Cumberleigh Hotchpot proceeded regularly upon that assumption;
and though Kitty had the sweetest temper ever bestowed
as a blessing to the owner and all around, this foregone conclusion
and heavenly pity (from a creature by no means celestial)
drove her sometimes towards the tremulous line which severs
sanity from insanity.</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_169" id="Page_169">[169]</SPAN></span></p>
<p>For it has been said, and perhaps with truth, that the
largest and soundest of human minds could not remain either
large or sound, if all the other minds it had to deal with
combined to pronounce it both small and unsound. Under the
hostile light, it could not save itself from shrinking; it would
glance about vainly for a gleam to suit its own, and then
straighten to a line with a cross at either end, like the pupil of
a cat in the fierce light of the sun.</p>
<p>Left in this manner without any friends, with her heart
and her soul among lions, my Kitty (although of strong
substance) began to doubt whether there is any justice. Good
as she was, and clear and truthful, and possessing that sense—which
is now turned into folly by higher discoveries—of a
guiding power beyond our own, she strove to believe that no
harm could touch her, while she continued blameless. But it
was a fearful battle for a timid maiden to have to fight.</p>
<p>Happily both for herself and me, her enemies, before they
got her down, fell out about their lawful prey. When Donovan
Bulwrag joined the hunt, at first he was content to turn the
quarry towards the other hounds, and enjoy the distress unselfishly.
But after a while, like an eager dog, he began to
kindle towards the prey, and shot forth jealous glances, and
resolved to have a nip for his own tooth. So far as such a
hound could care for anything outside his own hide, he became
enamoured of the charming chase.</p>
<p>His mother with her quick malignant eyes perceived it,
and was furious. Her pet scheme was that her sweet Downy,
her Golden Downy as she called him, should marry gold, and
succeed to the title—which was not improbable—restore its
impoverished glory, and set her on high triumphant. Then her
proud sister at Halliford would come and sue to be reconciled,
and her daughters with the lovely hair would shine and marry
fortunes. She would cast the Professor and his grimy works
behind her, and reign as she deserved to reign.</p>
<p>In furtherance of this lofty plan, she had already chosen
for her son a most desirable helpmate, a lady of good birth,
and yet sufficiently akin with commerce to redden her blue
blood with gold. And a very quiet harmless girl, who would
gladly fill the chest with guineas, and hand the key to her
mother-in-law. To be a step-mother to gentleness had been a
pleasant and refreshing task; but to be the mother-in-law of
wealth would afford even finer occasions of delight. She had
always been proud of her son’s strong will, and resolute knowledge<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_170" id="Page_170">[170]</SPAN></span>
of his own mind, while they moved in the course she had
marked for them; but if they went astray, they must be
crushed. With her usual promptitude she resolved to bring
the matter to a point at once.</p>
<p>Downy had arrived at the same determination. He had no
idea of doing what he disliked, and his mother had told him
that she meant to call upon Lady Clara Voucher (the only
child and heiress of the Earl of Clerinhouse), and expected his
company that afternoon in the carriage she had bought, but
not paid for. “Very well,” he had said, “we will talk about
it;” for his sisters were present, and he preferred a single
combat.</p>
<p>Knowing that his mother was now alone, he came into the
room with his quiet heavy tread, and sat down, and crossed his
legs, and looked at her. Downy Bulwrag, even while he was
a boy, had been able to earn a large competence of hatred; as
a young man he had increased the stock, and throve upon it,
and fattened on the butterine of his own slimy fame. Good
and simple young fellows of his own age disliked him, from
what they had heard of him; but none had the power to hate
him properly, until they had seen him. But after that they
knew what to do. They spat on the ground when they thought
of him.</p>
<p>“What is it, Downy?” asked his mother, unwarily surrendering
the weather-gage of silence. “You look as if something
had put you out. I think it is I who have the right to
be put out.”</p>
<p>Downy began to roll a cigarette—that ragged mummy of the
great king Nicot, which was then just beginning to cast its
dirty ash about. He wetted his fingers with a little sharp
smack of his lips, but made no answer.</p>
<p>“You will not smoke here,” cried his mother, already discarding
the superior maternal tone; “I never let your father
smoke in my presence; and I am sure I shall never let a boy
like you.”</p>
<p>“Who was going to smoke?” asked Downy, with gruff
contempt at this instance of feminine precipitance.</p>
<p>“You may smoke, by-and-by, when you have a house of
your own, and a dear little wife to spoil you. But you are
coming with me to see her, and you must not smell of tobacco
yet. For a short time you must be on your best behaviour.
Not that sweet Clara would ever object to anything you like,
my dear; but that others might take advantage of it, to make<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_171" id="Page_171">[171]</SPAN></span>
you seem less devoted to her than you are. She is the great
catch of the season, you know, and there are so many young
men after her. She will make the best wife any man could
have—so pleasant, and amiable, and accomplished, and in spite
of that so sweetly pretty. When I saw her, the night before
last at Lady Indigo’s, I thought I had never seen any one so
charming.”</p>
<p>“I don’t think much of her good looks.”</p>
<p>“Then you are most ungrateful, for she dotes on you. Her
dear friend, the Countess, said—‘Tell your noble Downy not
to be frightened by sweet Clara’s money. Her heart is entirely
his. What a lucky fellow!’ And then she sighed, for a
little plan of hers has been quite upset by this romantic episode.
Oh, you are fortunate indeed, my dear; and perhaps a
little credit may be fairly due to me. Now put on the coat
with the sable trimmings. You look so foreign, and distinguished
in it. And it shows your broad chest in such a
striking way. That dear Countess said that it made her quite
jealous about her dowdy countrymen. And she thought it had
something to do with your conquest.”</p>
<p>“I don’t mean to go at all.” The dutiful son, as he pronounced
these words, threw his bulky shoulders back, and
planted one big elbow on the arm of his easy-chair, and gazed
calmly through his yellow lashes, smiling slightly as he watched
the colour rising on his mother’s dark face. He knew that two
stern wills were coming into clash; and the victory would be
for the one that did not waste itself in fury.</p>
<p>“Do you mean to tell me,” began the lady, trembling at
heart, and her voice becoming tremulous, “that you intend
to throw away all I have done? That you will not marry Lady
Clara Voucher?”</p>
<p>“That is exactly what I do mean. I will never marry Lady
Clara Voucher.”</p>
<p>“And why? Perhaps you will condescend to give some
reason.”</p>
<p>“I mean to marry some one else. I mean to marry Kitty
Fairthorn.”</p>
<p>His mother arose, as she generally did, when her furious
temper burst all bonds. Often enough, and too often, she had
been in a tempest of wild passion; but never till now in such
a hurricane of rage. At first she was stilled by her own
commotion; and the lines of her face twitched as with palsy.</p>
<p>“Tell me again,” she said, crossing her arms, and speaking<span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_172" id="Page_172">[172]</SPAN></span>
with great effort, as she stood before him, and he sat tranquil;
“I cannot believe it, till I have heard it twice.”</p>
<p>“Certainly, ma’am, to oblige you. I mean to marry, not
Lady Clara, but your step-daughter, Kitty.”</p>
<p>“You ninny, you rebel, you stubborn doll!” she had usually
a fine store of these expressions, but they seemed to desert her
in this great need, and he nodded his head at every one, as if
to say, “Try something better than that”—“You—But it is
useless; you are too base to care, you sit there, like a lump of
yellow jaundice. Do you think that a beautiful girl like Kitty—the
vile, designing, artful minx; I will throttle her, I wish
I had her here. Go and fetch her, bring her to me; I don’t
blame you. But she shall pay for this, with her life she shall.
If they hang me to-morrow—”</p>
<p>“Come, mother, come. You have let off a good bit of steam
already. You’ll be as right as a trivet, after a few more choice
expressions. Don’t spare them, if they do you good, you know.”</p>
<p>“I shall never be right again. My heart is broken. I
feel myself dying, and you have killed me. You, my own son,
have murdered me. Oh, good God! What is this pain?”</p>
<p>She fell upon the floor, and moaned and gasped, pressing
both hands to her leaping heart, and scared of all wrath by the
dread of death; now and then she muttered prayers for mercy,
broken with groans of agony. Downy was terrified, and ran
for brandy, as she began to tear her hair, and clutch at the
carpet, with shrieks growing weaker and more gurgling. And
as he ran back, his sister Euphrasia met him, and snatched the
bottle from his hand.</p>
<p>“You have done it,” cried Frizzy; “I knew you would.
One of these days she’ll kill herself. You go away. You’re
not wanted here. She wouldn’t take it from your hand, to
save her life. I knew it must come. Get away, get away.
Don’t let her eyes hit upon you, when she rolls them; or she
will go off worse than ever. She knows everything, when she
is insensible.”</p>
<p>“Well, you women are a cure!” said Downy, recovering his
strength of mind. “I shall go to my own room, and have a
cigar. You can come and tell me, when she is all right.”</p>
<p>“I am not sure that she will ever be all right,” said his
sister, desiring to frighten him; “I have never seen her quite
so bad as this.”</p>
<p>But he only answered, “What a funk you are! She shall
not beat me, with all this stuff.”</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_173" id="Page_173">[173]</SPAN></span></p>
<p>He had very little conscience, and that little—to use a
stock-word now in fashion—particularly <i>reticent</i>. And the
still small voice, if there were any, could not find much to say
this time. In nothing but the rudeness of his manner had he
offended against strict right, and he never even knew when his
manner was rude, because it was his nature. He could not help
having a passionate mother, who flew into a fury when her
plans were crossed. So he smoked his cigar, and considered his
next step.</p>
<p>It was plain to him now, without need of thought—for he
was not good enough to be a fool—that something decisive
might be done at once. He knew what his mother was too well,
to suppose that any arguments of his, or any regard for his
feelings, would ever induce her to consent to his marriage with
Kitty Fairthorn. And he knew that Kitty did not like him
(although he had never ill-used her), and in her old-fashioned
way would regard the relation of their parents towards one
another as a bar to any marriage between them. And he knew
that her money, through her father’s neglect, had been placed
out of her disposal. But in spite of all obstacles, he meant to
have her, and her money afterwards.</p>
<p>Up to the present time, he had feigned to be the ally of Sir
Cumberleigh Hotchpot, and to forward his suit very warmly.
At the same time he had contrived to earn some gratitude from
Kitty, and to make her look upon him as her friend in need,
by flying to her rescue now and then, and sometimes even
carrying off her too insistent suitor. This he had been doing
more and more, as his passion increased, and jealousy combined
with pity on her behalf. Thoroughly despising the older
villain, for his shallowness more than his villainy, he began to
hate him also for his insolence to the fair one. Having now
declared his own intentions, he must put a stop to all that stuff.</p>
<p>While he was thinking much more of these things than of his
injured mother, he heard a gentle but hurried knock at his
door, and in came Kitty. She was trembling and flushed, with
some excitement, and her beautiful hair was disarranged.</p>
<p>“Oh, Donovan,” she cried, for she never called him
“Downy.” “I have heard that your mother is very ill, and
they are quite alarmed about her. Sarah came in such a hurry
for some bottle of my father’s; but I was afraid to let her have
it, for they have no idea how to use it. Don’t you think you
had better run for Doctor Yallop? They won’t let me in to
ask them, and I am afraid to go for him without orders.”</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><SPAN name="Page_174" id="Page_174">[174]</SPAN></span></p>
<p>“No, Kitty, no. It is nothing more than usual. She would
never see the doctor, if he came; and it would only set her off
again. Frizzy knows best how to manage her. She has been in a
great wax, even for her; and she is just a bit frightened, as she
ought to be. It will do her a world of good, when she comes
round, and teach her to take things easier. But you look quite
startled, my dear child. Give me a kiss, and I will tell you all
about it.”</p>
<p>Kitty obeyed, though with some reluctance. One of her
many charms was obedience, and she had often been told in
the early days, that as they were now one family, to exchange
the friendly salute was proper. But lately she had been
surprised that Downy, after long indifference to its value, had
returned to this form of expressing esteem.</p>
<p>The young man had meant to defer for a while a declaration
which must be unwelcome at first. But he felt sure now that
the first thing his mother would do, as soon as she was well
enough, would be to fall on the poor maiden about it, and put
it in the most outrageous way. Much better for his cause that
he should speak of it himself, and win perhaps some credit for
his defiance of Kitty’s natural foe. He was always bold in
word and deed, and now he spoke with as little fear as grace.</p>
<p>“You must have seen, my dear, that lately I have been
growing very fond of you. You have seen that I always take
your part when people go to bully you. And why do you
suppose I do it? Why, because I am so fond of you.”</p>
<p>“Thank you, Donovan. I have often thanked you in my
mind, though not in words. Placed as we are, it is quite right
that we should be fond of one another.”</p>
<p>“Oh, I don’t mean that sort of thing at all. My mother
married your Governor; but that would only make it natural
that we should hate one another. And there is no love lost
between you and Frizzy, or Jerry either, so far as that goes.
What I mean is that I am fond of you, as—as a fellow is of
his sweetheart. And I mean to marry you, indeed I do, as
soon—why, as soon as you like almost.”</p>
<p>Poor Kitty looked at him, as if he must be joking; or if it
were not that, he must have taken too much wine, as he did
sometimes, especially when he had been much with Sir
Cumberleigh.</p>
<p>“How provoking you are, Kitty! There, sit down. You
will get used to the idea in about five minutes. Why, there’s
<div style="break-after:column;"></div><br />